I’m currently on holiday in Florida, sat in a universal Studios waiting for my dad and brother to finish a ride.

I’m sat on the corner of a street watching the people walk past me and it kind of hits me how insignificant I feel. Looking at the people walking past there are all different. Kinds of people, all different shapes and sizes, all from different countries. There are large families all in the same t-shirt so they don’t lose track of each other. Small families walking in pairs with their children. Young kids with captai. America t-shirts on. I’m looking at all these people and I reckon in the space of about 10 mins, at least a thousand people have walked past me, that’s one thousand in ten minutes, if not more. Everyone walking past me is unique, they all have a different look, they all have different opinions, different lives. I start to wonder, as I watch all the people pass me, what makes me special? What makes me noticeable out of all these people walking past me constantly.

I then realise the answer, which I have already said, unique. I am unique, no one is like me, no one has the same fingerprint as me, no one has the same eyes as me. Yes there may be people who have similarities to me, opinions etc but there is only one person like me.

I quite enjoy watching the people pass me this way, I begin to wonder, where are they from? What job do they do? Are they related to anyone famous? Will the child walking past me grow up to be a scientist? Will the other child walking past me grow up to win an Olympic gold medal?

As I continue to watch the crowds pass me I continue to wonder about them and question do they wonder about me?

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Facebook

Facebook is great. Almost everyone I know uses it (including myself). I use it a lot for keeping in touch with friends and family that live overseas, sending them pictures etc.

However I have noticed lately a lot of things that annoy me with Facebook. Maybe I’m getting old and noticing these things more I don’t know but they seem to be bugging me more and more.

  1. Status Updates – People updating their status with “I’m feeling sad” or checking themselves in at the local hospital without explanation. Ok we get that you might be feeling low or your at the hospital for a serious reason but sometimes I can’t help but think that they do it for the comments and attention such as “omg are you ok?” “What’s going on?”and then they don’t reply! Why put it on Facebook for the whole world to see and just so that you can have lots of comments asking about your personal business.
  2. Sharing  – Ok sharing is good I admit, I like to see videos that people have shared especially entertaining ones. However when I see things like “Share this cloud and you will receive good luck for 10 years” that’s when I being to get skeptical. Or share this candle for someone that you know has had a specific illness. I just feel like it would do more good if you maybe donated some money or maybe donated your time to the cause that your sharing about, instead of sharing a picture of a candle, flower or ribbon.
  3. Fake News – “The UK set to have the worst snow storm in years in July!” This was legitimately a “article” that someone shared on Facebook the other day. People share these ridiculous “articles” claiming completely nonsense things like that you shouldn’t go out in the sun for more than 20 mins as it will kill you or don’t eat cucumber anymore as you will die. People share them but if you take a closer look at the source it’s some sort of completely unknown link or website that nobody has ever heard of. I begin to wonder how gullible some people are when they share links that claim that there is a worldwide shortage of shoes.
  4. Kids/Babies – Babies on Facebook, this is always a big subject within the internet. Should you be putting your children’s faces on the internet or not. I personally don’t mind seeing pictures of my friends children (even though they get posted in the thousands!). What bothers me is the small percentage of people who can’t seem to decide whether to post about their children. For example I have a friend of mine who posts pictures of her child but always covers up their face with an emoji of some sort. Today she even posted a picture of the baby holding a picture frame with a picture of themselves in, the baby had an emoji face and the picture of baby they were holding also had an emoji face! I kind of think to myself what’s the point! You either put pictures of your child up or not at all, there’s no in between.
  5. Moaning about other people – This is where the good old bitchiness on Facebook comes out, you regularly see those Facebook updates of “I don’t care what you think! I don’t want to see your fu***** face again!” all the while wondering if the post is aimed at you and whether you may have offended this person recently. It’s similar to the attention posts really, do people only post these things to get attention or to get a bit of self esteem boost of comments from people who comment things such as “You live your life the way you want babes, your amazing”.
  6. Inspirational Quotes – Ah the good old inspiration quote. Just a reminder to people that whatever their feeling there’s always a quote on google to match it. Don’t get me wrong I like the odd inspiration quote on Facebook every now and then but when I see someone sharing quotes at least half a dozen times a day, it’s a good way to get blocked! Same with videos showing animals in a distressed state, I’m sorry but I’d much rather donate some money to the cause rather than share it with a comment that says “disgusting”.

Don’t get me wrong I do like Facebook. but these are a few things that just seem to get on my nerves about it. I regularly have a “clear out” of my friends list as I feel that some of them are just friends with me to be nosey and keep up to date with what I’m doing and then will ignore me in the street. I don’t expect them to comment on every single thing I’m doing, but don’t friend request me just to be nosey!

More Makeup?!

I recently read an article stating that research shows that employers are more likely to give a woman a better salary if they wear more make up and look more groomed.

A study carried out showed that women who are more groomed earned significantly more money than those who were less groomed. What I would like to know is that if grooming was a factor when it comes to male income, my guess is not.

Since when did it make up become a factor when looking at women’s salaries?! How would the world react if men were judged on how strong they are or how they look topless to work out their salary? However it seems to be completely acceptable to state that a contributing factor to women’s salaries is how much make up they wear.

People ask me why I’m a feminist and it’s exactly reasons like this why I believe that we should all be treated equally. Women should not be judged on how much make up they wear and certainly it should not determine their salary. Who they are as person, their intelligence and their integrity should show for itself and those are the qualities that should be looked at.

How are we supposed to help empower women when this send s a very clear message that if you wear more make up you’ll achieve a higher salary. How are we supposed to encourage young women to work hard to achieve what they want to achieve when in reality this sends a message that all that really matters is how groomed you are.

What kind of message does this send in relation to equality? A very bad one is the answer.

Now don’t get me wrong, I like to wear make up, especially when going out. However I would hate to think that any employer would judge my ability to secure a good salary based on my make up and how well groomed I was.

Have you ever been judged on how you look?

Don’t underestimate me because of my gender.

As a woman working in a very male dominated environment I daily get underestimated by others, whether it’s my knowledge to do with my job, my ability to handle situations within my job or my understanding of different aspects of my job.

This morning a customer walked into my office and I’m pretty sure he actually passed through me to speak to “one of the lads”. I try not to delve too deep into the thoughts that he ignores me because of the fact that I’m a woman. It may not be the case he could just be completely arrogant.

You should never doubt yourself because you’re a woman. You can do whatever you want to do in this world. Never let anyone underestimate you because of your gender. I’m not saying we should spread hate of men, it’s changing the perception that some people have of women.

I am a feminist and if I say that to someone I sometimes feel that they think I’m suddenly going to go into a rant about how women are treated unfairly. I’m not, feminism is about equality and fairness. It’s about believing in the power of everyone and the equality of everyone.

I think that some people have this stereotypical view that if you’re a feminist you hate men or you hate women that dress provocatively, it simply means that you believe in equality for all genders. It’s believing that there is no limit to what we can accomplish. It’s encouraging young girls to follow their dreams rather than follow their Instagram.

You can accomplish far more than you think you can. If anyone ever tells you otherwise, the best thing you can do? Prove them wrong.

30

Tomorrow I leave my twenties and begin the new chapter of my life known as “30’s”.

Am I scared? Maybe a little, not because I feel old but because all of a sudden life seems to be moving at a rate that I can’t seem to keep up with.

I spent some time thinking about my twenties and how much fun I’ve had during that time. Do I have regrets? Yes of course I do and I hate having regrets. I do wish I’d pushed myself more and done more things during my twenties. I wish I’d of stood up for myself more and been more confident with situations. It does however make me more determined to do these things during my thirties.

When I say to people that I know “I’m turning 30 tomorrow” The usual responses I get are “I remember when I was 30” or “Wait till you get to 40”. No one seems to give me any advice or say things like “That’s great, enjoy it! Make the most of it!”. It all seems to be negative reactions.

I must admit at first I was really scared and I am still slightly scared, however I’ve kind of come to the realization that it’s going to happen and I need to make the most of my thirties and do the things that I didn’t get a chance to do during my twenties.

I think to myself if I have any kind of specific targets during my thirties? and the answer really is no. There is only one target I want to achieve during my thirties and that is no regrets. This needs to be my mantra during my thirties and I’m determined to stick to it.

I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my twenties and I do feel ready to start the next chapter of my book and make some incredible memories, but most importantly they will be memories that I want to make not what other people expect me to do.

If you’re turning 30 soon and are a little nervous,  maybe people keep telling you that you’re old or maybe people keep moaning at you about a life plan. The advice that I can give you is sod them! You’re as young as you feel. You’ve still got plenty of time to do whatever you want. Enjoy your life, have no regrets.

Stress

Stress. A word that is used probably on a daily basis, everyone has stress going on in their lives at one point or another. I HATE stress with a passion, it seems to linger around like a bad smell and the longer it lingers the more it tends to “spoil” and become horrid and unwanted.

It’s like when you bump into someone you know at the supermarket, you say hi how are you? etc etc but then you keep seeing them down every single aisle! They keep bumping into you and the more they do the more you get frustrated with it, by the end of your shopping trip you’re so frustrated and annoyed.

Isn’t it annoying when you’re talking with someone and you may say something along the lines of “I’ve got so much stress going on at the moment, my job is busy, I haven’t had time to relax and everyday life is just manic”. They then say “Oh yeah gosh me too, I’m so stressed, I’m really having trouble shifting that last pound” You feel like screaming “What the Fu**!” and try to fight the urge to strangle them!

So shall I tell you about my stress going on at the moment? That is if you want to read it of course!

Quick background story:

So myself and my husband run a small local business doing mechanical repairs, my hubby has been working for about 13 years and has only recently taken over from my father in law whom unfortunately passed away 2 years ago. I started working in the office alongside my brother in law about 18 months ago.

So the reason for our stress is that lately that my hubby isn’t happy anymore running the business and he feels that he can’t do it. Every time I try to talk to him about what’s bothering him he just says “nothing” but I know there is lots on his mind. I try not to push him because I don’t want to push him further away.

I know he misses his dad but I also know that he does much more than he thinks he can do. It’s hard when he won’t talk to me about what us going through his head.

The other issue is my brother in law in the office. He just does not seem to care about the business and isn’t the slightest bit bothered if things don’t get sorted and he can get funny with customers and suppliers. This really pi**** me off because this is our livelihood and we depend on people bringing their cars to us. The role of myself and my brother in law in the office to help run things smoothly but he seems to be more of a hindrance rather than a help.

Some people say to me “Oh I bet it’s great running your own business, time off when you want, work whatever hours you want” My reply is always the same: “Well you have obviously never run a business”. People don’t see the 7am starts the 7pm finishes, the paperwork to be done on evenings and weekends, the absolute chaos to try and organise if we want to have a day off, we are always the last to arrive to a meal out with family/friends, the arguments about the business, the toll is can take on a marriage. Sometimes a marriage can feel like a 3 person marriage, myself, my husband and the business.

So anyway that’s my little stress story. How do you cope with stress?

 

 

 

Body Confidence

Many people seem to suffer with body confidence and it can come in all different forms. Some people find it hard to go swimming because they worry about how exposed they feel. Some may be concerned when going to the gym and worry about being judged by others. Some may find the idea of going shopping hard as they may worry about how they look in different clothes.

It got me wondering lately about why people may have poor body confidence or may not feel that they can wear whatever they want. It occurred to me that there are influences all around us that can cause body confidence issues.

You walk past clothes shops, the manikins used are mainly a size 8-10, flat chested and long legs, how on earth does this reflect women?! It only reflects a very small proportion of women, what about the rest of us? The average size in the UK is a size 16. It appears to me that if you’re walking past all these stores showing these clothes on a size 8-10 then you could start to believe that these are the only sizes that the clothes will look good on. Asos for example label their plus size collection as “curve”. Many women are curvy and it does not mean that just because you may be curvy the only collection you can shop in is the plus size. It’s putting curvy and plus size as the same meaning and that is not that case at all.

I was watching TV the other day and an advertisement came on for a new show call “My Hotter Half” and the premise of the show is to pit couples against each other and show their selfies to strangers and get strangers to rate them on “hotness” and see who comes out on top. Who pitches these ideas?! If young adults/adolescents are watching this show does it not just show to them that the hotter you look the more approval you will get from strangers?! Surely the way you are and the way you look shouldn’t have to be proved to people and strangers opinions do not matter on your appearance.

I’m partial to the odd selfie don’t get me wrong but the other week I was having lunch in town and saw a group of approx 14 year old’s take what I believe was about 30 selfies, all in different poses and it just seemed that they were more concerned with how to show the social media world what they were doing rather than actually making those memories real!

If you suffer with body confidence then all I can say is that you’re not alone and that you are beautiful no matter what size you are.