Dealing with Grief

Grieving in some form or another is something that we all will go through at some point in our lives, whether this is grieving for a loved one or another form of grief.

But how do we grieve? What ways do we handle it?

I’ve recently lost a member of my immediate family and people keep saying to me “don’t forget to grieve” “Are you taking time to grieve?” “What stage of grief are you at?” and I thought to myself what is taking time to grieve? Am I supposed to just stop and grieve at certain points throughout my day, because as I see it grieving is not something that I can turn on and off it just seems a constant feeling at the moment.

On the internet there are thousands of websites that state the “5 stages of grief” and to be honest they’re all different, am I supposed to link myself to a stage and make my head do what these “stages” tell me to do. Everyone is different I don’t feel as though I should be labelled into a category depending on how my grief is manifesting itself (Sounds like the “denial” stage doesn’t it?!?!).

We all cope with grief differently, some of us like to keep it to ourselves and others feel better after a good chat with a friend and just being able to get it off our chest. When people ask me if I’m grieving I don’t like to delve into it too much as I see it as my personal business and don’t want to share my grief process with others, however other people may find this helpful to chat to people.

I’ve suffered with mental health issues in the past such as depression, anxiety etc and I’m really trying hard to not let this be a trigger to becoming depressed again, obviously I am grieving but I’m also very aware that I can’t let it overtake me (which I know my relation who is no longer here would not want). That sounds awful doesn’t it? It’s not that I don’t miss the person I would give both my legs to have them back, and I am grieving I just don’t want the grief to consume me.

It’s hard to explain how my head is at the moment and it’s difficult to remain positive in the current situation.

How do you deal with situations related to grief? What coping mechanisms work best for you?

Z

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